1). THE MINORMOUS GELONS (4-2)
Grant is coming in averaging slightly over 102.2 points a week and remains a top of the power rankings at the completion of six weeks of the NFL season. Grant wasted no time after hearing of Ezekiel Elliot’s suspension as he acquired Antonio Brown for a third rounder from Steve. As of now, it surely looks like a team will need to acquire additional talent to contend with Grant moving forward. To say the GELONS are on the move would be a vast understatement.
2). Yarvard U (4-2)
Class is in session, and Schindler decided to mortgage the future to upgrade at the RB position. Leonard Fournette, the second overall back in ESPN standard, joins Yarvard U and possibly creates the best trio in the league. Schindler continues to get production across his roster and looks to upgrade to contend with Grant in the future. On a lighter note, the Baltimore Ravens suck.
3). Grande Se Cador (3-3)
Tom is getting major production from Gordon/Gurley. The acquisition of Todd Gurley saved his season, and he practically gave up nothing to get him. Tom is in desperate need of a WR. With that addition, he’s a team to be reckoned with going forward. In other news, I tried to deal with Tom this week. He loves to “get back to you and think about it.” I’m convinced you could offer him $5,000 and he’d need to “think about it”. No one in the history of the world is more painful to deal with than Tom. If you want to make a deal with him before the deadline…you probably will want to start now.
4). Ring Your Bell! (4-2)
Shula is an idiot. He doesn’t understand player value and each year makes a stupid trade that gives another league owner a major advantage going into the next year. For those who aren’t aware, he gave a 5th rounder to Josh for Aaron Rodgers and Rodgers broke his collarbone and is out of the season. Man, it’s a good thing he still has Luck available. He’s only eaten a roster spot for 7 weeks with no production. Maybe this will teach Shula to stop being a moron. Not because Aaron got hurt. No one can predict injuries, but that no QB is worth a fifth round pick.
5). Dixie Normous (2-4)
I’m of the opinion that Alex’s record is very misleading. He’s third in points, and lost this week scoring nearly 100. Alex has been quiet on the trade front, and I think it’s time to begin having conversations with league owners about getting a 2/1 for Julio Jones. This team, and it’s construction, is good enough to make the playoffs. However, Alex needs to stop being so conservative and start upgrading his roster.
6). The Cluster Screw (3-3)
There have been numerous reports that Earl got into a trade debacle with Josh yesterday. Did Earl back out of a deal on Josh, or is Josh merely being dramatic in regards to a potential deal for the Muscle Hampster? Earl has found a serious weapon in the form of DeShaun Watson, and looks to roll Shady off a much needed BYE week. Many believed Earl was losing his touch with the addition of Merrily in his life, but it looks like he’s just getting started and looking to make a push into the playoffs.
7). Prison Mike’s Riot Squad (3-3)
Believe it or not, Justin is only 5 points away from being the lowest scoring team in the BBC this year. He comes in at seven due to some players that need to get going (Green, Thomas, and Montgomery). Justin made a major mistake acquiring Lynch. He sucks, and is borderline unstartable going forward. There’s no doubt that this team can make the playoffs, but he needs some serious help at Montgomery/Jones seem to be splitting carries.
8). Yo Adrians (2-4)
Ryan Succop!!!! Titan up!!!!! Ryan Succop saved Eric’s season over Josh who played a bunch of morons to stay at the top of the waiver wire. With the additional of Adrian Peterson, one could certainly say that this team is on the rise. Will he once again be humbled? The GELONS are coming to town. Will he look to deal one of this five receivers?
9). Captain Hook and Ladder (4-2)
I don’t really know what to say. Each year, there’s a team that wins that really shouldn’t. Steve is certainly embodying that so far this year. He’s winning and has also invested into next year’s draft acquiring Grant’s third rounder. On a much more serious note, we are all in prayer for big man Todd Ellis for improved health. If you read this, please join us. We all appreciate it.
10). I Am RORY (1-5)
Josh has given up and has already acquired three picks for next year. Just to rip Shula some more for being an idiot – Josh did get a fifth for Aaron Rodgers. Josh is looking to deal Doug Martin today, if interested.